Chapter 48
I cried for no reason.
I got emotional and cried in front of Iomene for no reason.
It must have been a huge shock to her because ever since then, she had been stuck to me like glue.
It was exhausting.
No—seriously.
Trying to follow me into the bathroom was crossing the line, wasn’t it??
But what could I do?
She was the next Saintess of the White Order and the daughter of the current Emperor.
I couldn’t just push her away because I found it annoying.
I had no choice.
So, I had to keep her by my side while teaching her basic common sense.
“Emotional stability” sounded fancy, but in reality, it was no different from what I had already been doing for her in the secluded palace.
Playing with her, reading her books, staying by her side when she slept, eating meals together.
“Together! Together!!”
Refusing to bathe together.
“Together! Together!!”
Refusing to sleep in the same bed.
“Marriage! Marriage!”
Whenever I told her that wasn’t possible, she would throw a fit and keep pestering me about getting married.
Even when I rejected her, she would glare at me, full of dissatisfaction, but the moment I patted her head, she would immediately brighten up and grin like an idiot.
I taught her how to hold a fork and knife properly, how to interact with people, and how to speak more appropriately.
As for things like bathing and personal hygiene, which were difficult for a man to teach, she learned from the female priests of the White Order.
While spending time with Iomene, I also continued making preparations to escape from the temple.
I had already secured the emergency funds—10kg of gold from His Majesty.
Once the unicorn pendant was completed, I could use it to sustain my mental energy for time-stop.
Now, all that remained was figuring out how to evade tracking miracles.
“You wish to evade a tracking miracle?”
There were always battle priests and holy knights from the White Order around Iomene.
Since she was constantly glued to me, that meant there were always priests from the White Order in my vicinity.
Since their order specialized in dealing with worshippers of the Evil God and demon cultists, I figured they would know about this field better than anyone, so I casually asked one day.
“Tracking miracles are directly cast on a person’s soul, meaning they cannot be avoided unless one uses an extremely powerful curse or dark magic.”
“…Is that so?”
I was doomed.
So, it was unavoidable?
“Yes. However, as powerful as the effect is, it has considerable drawbacks. It consumes an enormous amount of divine power and is heavily affected by distance. Typically, anything beyond one kilometer is undetectable. Moreover, the priest who casts the miracle must have personally seen the target before.”
Thank god!
I wasn’t doomed after all!
“I didn’t know it had those limitations.”
“If it were all-powerful, every last worshipper of the Evil God and demon cultist in the world would have been captured already. The necessity of direct sight and the range limitation are why battle priests and holy knights periodically patrol rural areas with weak law enforcement or regions with high resentment energy, checking for any previously sighted cultists.”
“You must work tirelessly.”
“It’s nothing compared to what Saint has done.”
One-kilometer range limitation.
And rural or crime-ridden areas where priests and holy knights are likely to patrol.
So, what this meant was—
I had to escape to a large city.
Not the countryside. Not a crime-ridden area where patrolling priests could recognize me.
Somewhere big enough that even if multiple priests used miracles simultaneously, it would still be hard to pinpoint me.
And ideally, a place that was traditionally anti-religious—somewhere priests and knights wouldn’t easily visit.
I needed to find a place like that, rent a house, change my appearance, and live so quietly that no one would ever notice me.
Let’s see…
I could think of a few cities that fit the criteria.
But which one should I choose?
While I was lost in thought, someone knocked on the door.
“Saint, Erfa is here to see you.”
Erfa had come to see me.
She used to visit me every day.
The fact that she hadn’t visited in the past few days, ever since the Evil God fragment incident, had been more unusual.
“I’d like to speak with Saint alone. Could you give us some privacy?”
At my request, the White Order’s holy knights and Imperial Guards carefully exited the room.
Then, without much thought, I invited Erfa inside, expecting her usual demeanor.
She would walk in with a cheerful smile—
…But she wasn’t smiling.
“Like! Like!!”
As always, Iomene was clinging to my side.
But Erfa neither greeted me warmly nor blushed like she usually did.
Instead, she stared silently at Iomene.
“Welcome, Erfa.”
I greeted her, but she didn’t respond.
Her gaze remained firmly locked on Iomene.
“I greet Your Highness, the princess.”
Erfa spoke formally to Iomene.
But her tone was cold, as if she were drawing an invisible line between them.
Then, finally, she turned to look at me.
“…You seem to be taking care of Her Highness’s treatment.”
Her voice was quiet and subdued.
I nodded.
“We’re focusing on emotional healing. Once she’s stable, we’ll proceed with the procedure to restore her mind.”
“I see.”
Iomene seemed to have picked up on Erfa’s gaze and turned her eyes toward her.
Their stares clashed in midair.
It felt like actual sparks were flying.
This…
This was jealousy.
“Hisssss….”
Did Iomene sense something in Erfa’s blank expression?
She bared her teeth and hissed like a cat.
I quickly patted Iomene’s head to calm her down before approaching Erfa.
Iomene looked visibly flustered as I left her side so decisively, but what could she do?
I had known Erfa far longer than her.
“The treatment is set to end tomorrow. After that, she will return to the Imperial Palace. She’s only staying by my side until then, nothing more.”
At my words, the stiff look on Erfa’s face softened slightly.
She carefully stepped closer to me.
“…Me too.”
“Pardon?”
“I want to stay by your side too.”
Iomene’s hissing intensified.
I quickly patted her head again.
At the same time, I grabbed Erfa’s hand and sat down on the bed with her.
Erfa, looking very much like she was jealous, leaned her head against my shoulder.
Thanks to her four arms, she was able to hold my hand, wrap her arms around my waist, and grip my arm all at the same time.
Iomene’s hissing reached its peak.
She even extended her nails, ready to claw at Erfa’s hand, but I gently intercepted her attack.
Soon, I would disappear.
I would leave the temple, abandon my fake saint act, and live quietly, unnoticed.
That was why—before that happened—I needed to create the best possible memories for Erfa.
Of course, Iomene had no way of knowing that.
She widened her eyes and stared at me with a look of pure betrayal.
Please understand, Your Highness.
Once I’m gone, Erfa will have to spend the rest of her life without me.
I need to make her as happy as I can before I leave.
“You once told me to love myself more than I love you, Saint.”
“Yes, I remember saying that.”
“When you were fighting the Evil God’s fragment, those words echoed in my mind. That’s why I didn’t run to you. Because I believed in you. I trusted that you would return safely to my side.”
Erfa fidgeted with her fingers.
She pressed herself even closer to my arm.
A soft, sweet scent filled the air.
“I’m glad I listened to you. Just as I believed, you came back to me.”
…I’m sorry.
The truth is, I probably shouldn’t have come back at all.
Even now, I still couldn’t fully understand it.
It was an Evil God’s fragment.
Not just any ordinary fragment, but one of the Evil God’s very essence.
And yet, when it entered my body… it suddenly screamed and died.
The White Order never mentioned anything like this in their teachings about the fragments.
All the stories I read were about heroes, saintesses, and saints suffering immense pain, losing their sanity, and ultimately perishing after encountering an Evil God’s fragment.
I had never read a single case where one just died inside someone’s body.
What the hell was the real reason behind it?
I wanted to ask the priests, but I couldn’t.
They would undoubtedly just start worshiping me even more.
For now, the best thing I could do was let their interest in me die down.
Just thinking about it made me irritated, so I stopped overanalyzing it.
“I don’t doubt anymore. Even if you leave for a while, I know now… you’ll come back to me.”
Erfa smiled radiantly as she spoke.
Her words only made me even more depressed.
Even though she had four arms, she was still a woman who truly loved me.
Yet, I was about to leave her behind.
It wasn’t fair.
I didn’t want to stop at just holding hands.
I didn’t want to stop at just kissing.
I wanted more.
I wanted to share something deeper with her.
But I couldn’t.
If I crossed that final line, I wouldn’t be able to hold back my feelings anymore.
Damn it.
If I had to be honest…
I think I had fallen for Erfa.
I mean, how could I not?
A beautiful woman came to see me every day, blushed whenever she looked at me, and showered me with affection.
Of course, I would fall for her!
In my mind, I had already envisioned us getting married, having children, and even spoiling our grandkids.
But for her sake, I had to leave.
Lillia, Goddess of Light, you…
I really, truly hate you.
Why are you doing this to me?
Why?
“I am merely a staff. Something to be used and then discarded when no longer needed.”
I gently stroked Erfa’s head, just as I did with Iomene.
“Don’t be attached to me. Enjoy the moments we have together, but even if I disappear, live well. Live beautifully. Take care of yourself. Understood?”
Erfa nodded.
Then, she cupped my face in her hands and pulled me toward her.
A kiss.
A soft, timid kiss.
Happiness and sorrow washed over me at the same time.
It hurt.
Why?
Why can’t we be together, even though we both love each other?
I had to stop at just this.
If I went any further…
Leaving would become unbearable.
Erfa’s kiss lasted a long time.
I could feel Iomene staring in shock, completely frozen.
After about thirty seconds, Erfa finally pulled away, her face flushed, wearing a dreamy expression.
“Saint….”
“…Erfa.”
“Um… if, uh…”
She fumbled with something in her pocket, looking nervous.
What is it?
Was she about to pull out a condom or something?
Wait. Did condoms even exist in this era?
If the Goddess weren’t watching over me, I absolutely would have initiated something myself.
But right now, I had to keep my distance.
I clenched my fists.
I couldn’t go any further than this.
I wasn’t some impotent fool, okay?
I was fully functioning, just as capable as any male lead in an adult webtoon…
And yet, I had to act like some celibate monk.
“…I’m sorry, but I think you should leave now, Erfa.”
“Huh? B-but…”
“Iomene’s treatment isn’t finished yet.”
Erfa’s expression darkened with disappointment.
It felt like my heart was being torn apart.
I’m not impotent.
I want this, too.
But I can’t.
If I do, you’ll suffer for it.
And I don’t want that.
Erfa had been through enough—she deserved happiness.
Right now, pushing her away was the right thing to do.
Looking embarrassed and flustered, she lowered her head before slowly standing up.
She left the room without even saying goodbye.
Once she was gone, I bowed my head in regret and misery.
But before I could dwell on it, Iomene grabbed my face.
When I turned to look at her, her expression was filled with rage.
“Kiss.”
She demanded.
Like an order.
“I want a kiss too.”
She tried to pull my face toward her.
I quickly stopped her.
“Iomene, don’t do this.”
“Kiss!! I want one too!!”
For the first time, she shouted in frustration.
She practically tried to tackle me, and I had to push her back.
“Y-you’re still hurt! Your mind is hurt! If you’re not fully healed, you can’t!”
At my desperate excuse, she froze.
“…If I’m not hurt anymore?”
Her eyes were dead serious.
“If I’m fully healed… then a kiss?”
I let out an awkward laugh.
Fine.
I’ll give you a kiss.
On the forehead.
“…Alright. I promise.”
“Promise.”
Iomene pouted.
“Promise.”
Once she was healed, she would return to her duties as an Imperial Princess and Saintess.
I would be gone by then.
So, by the time she came back for that kiss…
I wouldn’t be here anymore.
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