Chapter 9
“Honey, are you coming home early tonight?”
“Uh… maybe…”
Krates mumbled a vague reply to his wife Kshalri.
His work schedule had been unpredictable lately, and tonight was no exception.
“I’ve been put on a major project. Once it’s done, it’ll boost my performance review—and if all goes well, I might get transferred to HQ. Then you’ll be a madam again.”
Back when he was alive, Krates had been a prince.
A prince of a small, unremarkable country—but royalty nonetheless.
His wife, Kshalri, had lived the pampered life of a princess consort.
Now, in the Soul Society, she lived as an ordinary housewife.
But HQ?
That was the divine dream job in this world.
For a mortal soul to work at HQ was considered more prestigious than ruling an entire kingdom.
If Krates could land a spot there, Kshalri could once again live like the noblewoman she once was.
“The pay at HQ is great too. We could finally move into one of those brand-new Elysium apartments. Didn’t you say you always wanted to live in one?”
Instead of replying, Kshalri gently fixed the knot of Krates’s tie and brushed his shoulders lovingly.
As Krates left for work, his young son Platan stood by the door, eyes wide.
“Mom, it’s my birthday today… Do you think Dad will remember to bring me a present? I really wanted that Nymphtendo Switch 2. I told him a bunch of times, but I don’t think he remembers.”
“Daddy’s busy with work, sweetie. But Mommy will make you a crown from the flowers we planted together. Look~”
Krates paused by the door, listening to their conversation.
His son’s birthday.
When was the last time he’d even celebrated it?
In this timeless afterlife, birthdays were rare—but with the introduction of time standards in the Soul Society, some traditions had started to resurface.
Time.
And the Titan of Time—Chronos.
“This collaboration with Chronos is my golden ticket.”
Krates, Assistant Manager of Punishment Enforcement Team 1, clenched his fist.
He was going to seize this opportunity by the horns.
“Joy, today is where your lucky streak ends.”
While Joy had wasted nearly two weeks prepping a literal trash dump for Chronos’s office, Krates had already scoped out prime real estate.
“If Joy fails to secure Chronos, I’ll sweep in and win him over in style.”
As Chronos arrived in downtown Happy World, Krates volunteered to personally give him the tour—
specifically to show him better plots before Joy could drag him to the landfill.
Their first stop: a hot spring.
“Chronos, sir, Happy World is known for its restorative hot springs. Many of HQ’s executives vacation here.”
“Hmph.”
Chronos let out a sharp snort.
Okay… not the hot springs, then.
On to plan B.
“This here is the Temple of Gold. They say your era was the Golden Age, correct? If you decide to collaborate with us, I thought it might be fitting to place your office here.”
“Tsk, tsk.”
Another click of the tongue. Another rejection.
Fine.
Time for the trump card: Happy World’s downtown core—featuring both the hot springs and the temple.
Chronos? Visibly disgusted.
“What is this eyesore of a place?”
What was going on?
Krates couldn’t wrap his head around it.
But at the same time, a smug thought crept in.
“Chronos has exquisite taste. He’ll absolutely blow up when he sees the wasteland Joy picked. Joy’s getting fired for sure.”
And then—
They arrived at Joy’s barren dump.
Chronos’s eyes welled with tears.
“This is it. The place I’ve been looking for. Wide. Desolate. Barren. Perfect.”
Everyone stood frozen.
Even the almighty Krates was seconds from tearing out his hair.
“Chronos, sir… forgive me, but may I ask something as a lowly mortal? What… do you see in this useless land?”
It was a bit blunt, bordering on disrespectful—
But Chronos, deeply moved by Joy’s choice, was feeling generous.
“I’m known as the Titan of Time. But long before that, I was also called the Titan of Agriculture. My calling—my essence—was working the land, sowing vegetables, nurturing soil.”
He knelt down and scooped up a handful of dirt.
As the soil crumbled between his fingers, he smiled in awe.
“Most lands in the underworld are contaminated with precious metals or cursed by hot springs. Totally unsuitable for farming. But this place—it’s just earth. Just honest soil.”
Oh…
Only then did Krates understand why his flashy picks had all failed.
Chronos didn’t want gold or glamor.
He just wanted dirt.
“I hear things, you know. I heard Assistant Manager Joy spent two weeks scouring every inch of Happy World to find a place worthy of me. That’s the kind of dedication that truly satisfies me.”
Because Chronos was the Titan of Time, he could feel how much real time Joy had poured into this.
“Even my own children never showed me that kind of devotion…”
To be so earnestly cared for—
To be considered worthy despite being labeled a monstrous inmate—
It was enough to bring tears to his ancient eyes.
Though old and forgotten—
Joy had treated him with dignity.
“Bring me the contract. As long as Assistant Manager Joy remains in the Soul Society, I—Chronos—will be proud to collaborate. Time shall now flow in harmony.”
“What?! Joy, you’ve surpassed me, who’s been a department head in Happy World for 300 years!”
“To think Chronos agreed! A miracle not even the divine era witnessed! Ha! Joy! I, Markius, knew you’d pull it off! Pay up, everyone! I won the bet!”
WAAA!
Cheers erupted from all directions.
Krates stood stunned, overcome by frustration…
And the unmistakable feeling of having hit a wall he’d never climb.
Joy, the true protagonist of the day—simply smiled.
***
Clang! Clang! Clang!
A towering old man—easily twice the size of everyone around him—tilled the field.
He worked hard, sweat pouring from his body.
The residents of Happy World whispered amongst themselves as they watched.
“Can’t believe they’re making that fearsome Titan do manual labor. What was that employee’s name again?”
“Joy. The guy who made Sisyphus cry like a baby.”
“He’s terrifying. Definitely a demon in disguise.”
Maybe Chronos looked a bit too much like a prisoner being punished in a labor camp.
And maybe a few people misunderstood and assumed I was the one who ordered it.
At this point, I didn’t even have the energy to explain myself.
Not that they’d believe me anyway.
How the hell did it come to this?
All I ever wanted was to get fired for incompetence.
Why is failing such a hard thing to do?
How does one even screw up properly?
It’s like I’ve forgotten how to lose.
At this rate, even if I tripped over a random pebble, it’d probably turn out to be a nugget of gold.
Seriously.
Thud, thud—
Just in case, I kicked at the dirt with my toe.
Something sparkled.
I gasped and quickly shoveled soil over it again.
I never want to see another gold vein for as long as I live.
“Here! I grew these cabbages and radishes myself—take ’em!”
“Thanks to how hard Sisyphus worked, the fake sun in the afterlife actually kicked into gear. Had a heck of a harvest this year!”
Chronos handed me some vegetables with a proud smile.
The whispers from Happy World’s residents only got louder.
“Is Joy… shaking down Chronos?”
“Man, this guy really is scary… I thought the whole ‘made Chronos cry’ thing was an exaggeration, but nope!”
Unbelievable.
Why does my bad reputation keep growing?
“Chronos, enjoying your work?” I asked, half-sarcastic.
This old man’s refusal to play along with my grand plan was making things worse for me.
I was now so overworked I barely had time to eat.
But instead of picking up on my sarcasm, the old man just flashed a wide grin.
“Oh-ho! Just call me ‘old man.’ No need for formality between us, eh? As for the work—it’s delightful! Sweat, labor, and reaping the harvest—that’s what life’s all about. A proper life, you know?”
“Sure, sure. Whatever you say.”
“Joy, I owe you big. I don’t have much to offer besides radishes and cabbages… but I do have a smidgen of divine power left. What say you? Want to receive my 《Blessing》?”
The word blessing made my forehead tingle.
I couldn’t help but remember when Princess of Hell, Melinoe, gave me hers.
The mark had faded, but the memory hadn’t.
“Wait. Do I have to kiss you or something to get it?”
“Nah, that’s what immature young gods do. Unless… you want a kiss from this old man? I won’t say no.”
Guh. Nope. No thanks.
I shook my head quickly, and the giant old farmer raised his hands toward the sky and proclaimed:
“I, Chronos, the Castrator of Heaven and Tiller of Soil, hereby bestow my 《Blessing》 upon the Happy World employee, Joy! You are truly lucky—my 《Blessing》 is not given lightly! Hohoho!”
Well, yeah, I guess that makes sense.
In mythology, you had to be a hero to receive a god’s blessing.
In Happy World, you probably had to be at least a department head.
“So… what exactly does your 《Blessing》 do?”
“You’ll know exactly when to water and fertilize your plants. Hohohoho!”
…That’s it?
I was hoping for a time-freezing power or something. This was kind of anticlimactic.
Clang! Clang!
The elderly god went back to digging rocks out of the soil.
He was covered in sweat, but he looked genuinely happy.
“Old man, thanks for the radishes and cabbage. I’ll drop by once a week to check on your progress, so keep working hard, alright?”
“This old timer wouldn’t mind if you came every day!”
“Yeah, well I would.”
Heh.
I chuckled under my breath and made my way back to the office building.
As soon as I stepped inside the Happy World HQ, Section Chief Bones blasted a fanfare.
“Manager Joy! I’ve got good news and happy news! Which do you want first?”
“The good news.”
“Thanks to your flawless execution of the Chronos collaboration, you’ve been promoted to Manager! That’s a first since the founding of the company! You’ll be taking on even more responsibilities from now on!”
Ugh.
I’m already drowning in work—and they want to increase it?
“That was the good news. What’s the happy news?”
“Ahem! We don’t use negative language anymore, Joy Manager. Remember, ever since the work culture reform, we say ‘happy news’ instead of bad news!”
“Okay, okay. What’s the so-called happy news?”
“Well, HQ’s Inspection Division has started keeping a close eye on us. They think your promotion was too fast. You better watch your back—they’re ruthless. Especially the new recruit…”
Shake shake shake—
Section Chief Bones trembled, all the way down to his skeletal frame.
But honestly, that sounded like great news to me.
They’re monitoring me closely now?
Even better.
“Alright, this way, Manager Joy. You’ve got your own office now. Your new assignments are already stacked on your desk.”
THUMP.
The tower of files piled up to the ceiling.
My eyes stung just looking at them.
Unreal.
Still… a private office!
If you’ve ever worked in a cramped open floor plan, you know the dream of having your own space.
Anyway, I was officially a Manager now.
Manager.
Straddling the line between field agent and middle management.
From here on out, it wasn’t just about my personal performance—it was about leading teams.
I had the title, and I had HQ’s eyes on me.
Now… how could I use this situation to switch jobs?
Ding!
I had a brilliant idea.
I grabbed a wide sheet of paper and scrawled out a notice, then slapped it onto the bulletin board outside my office:
「Happy World – Department of Punishment Execution: Now Hiring!」
「No experience or qualifications? PERFECT!」
「Nymphs especially welcome!」